Prototypes

by Mark Joseph

Elostic: shrinks after every extension. A sample in Cambridge, once a yard long, is
now a quarter of an inch after a curator fondled it.


Hard to locate, dense and indestructible – like grief.


Elaaastic: a response to elostic. It grows with every subsequent stretch. Complete
strips are elusive, but for a different reason.


Thin, brittle, and invisible – like regret. (See: God of Fragments). 


Ecslackstic: snaps back into shape, progressively slower (sometimes years). Elon
Gates made ersatz product, ‘pre-aged’, and marketed it as Eslowstic.

Few have the patience to verify this. (See: Truth, Speed, and the News Cycle).


Elastic: a substance that returns, swiftly, to its original shape after deformation.
The practical uses are varied, but as a metaphor generator…


(……………………(….)………………………)


I am indebted to the journals of Norse Bartrum (1863-1926): the ‘Edison of Edenbridge’, pioneer of early elastic. Recommended further reading: ‘Beyond Application: Bartrum, The Universal Recalibrator’ (Springer, 1996), for his inspired but partially successful: ‘Fallers’ gravity-stopper trousers, empathy mittens, and ‘Mercy Mercy Mercy’ total adoration musk.

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Mark Joseph writes to amuse a handful of friends. He’s had some success in obscure competitions, but he’s never written anything as good as a cheese and onion toastie. 
(email: orsondawson@gmail.com – for further details).

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