Mary Paterson
Read by Hannah Nicklin, Johanna Linsley, Greg McLaren
Instructions
- A, B and C are separate speakers.
- Stand in a row, facing the audience.
- Shout each question like a rallying cry.
- Pause at the empty lines.
- Start at a comfortable pace, then speed up to make sure you fit it all in within three minutes.
A |
Are you here? |
B |
Are you recording? |
C |
Are you ready? |
A |
Are you asking for it? |
A |
Which Friends character are you, based on your birth month? |
B |
Can we guess if you had sex this morning? |
C |
What does your most used emoji say about you? |
A |
Do you know what’s happening in the news? |
B |
Which United Nations security council member are you? |
C |
Which Disney sidekick are you based on your zodiac sign? |
A |
Do you believe in James Bond? |
B |
Can you match the iconic phone to the movie? |
C |
What does a billionnaire put on her skin? |
A |
Who is looking after your most elderly relative? |
B |
Are you being followed? |
C |
Are you in the public interest? |
A |
Would you press the button? |
C |
Are you hungry? |
A |
Are you ready? |
B |
Is this how you keep up with things? |
A |
Is this what you wanted? |
B |
Is this what you asked for? |
C |
Are you asking for it now? |
A |
Have you forgotten something recently? |
B |
How well do you know sandwiches? |
A |
Which famous blond will you marry? |
B |
Do you like to wear other people’s clothes? |
A |
Can you bear the sound of other people breathing? |
B |
Are you a seedy bitch, a needy bitch or a greedy bitch? |
C |
Would you like to share? |
B |
What is keeping you? |
C |
What is keeping you here? |
B |
Are you asking for it? |
C |
Are you asking for it now? |
B |
Are you recording me? |
C |
Are you legal? |
A |
What are the ten best paperbacks ever? |
B |
What is the last thing you should do before you die? |
C |
Have you travelled further than your parents in their lifetime? |
A |
Have you considered a cruise? |
B |
Have you ever seen a feminist movie? |
C |
Can you guess what these world famous DJs eat for breakfast? |
A |
Do you have tough, scaly skin? |
B |
Do you have a problem belly? |
C |
Do you announce things to strangers? |
A |
Do you want to keep moving? |
B |
Would you share your bedroom? |
C |
Do you steal food? |
A |
Have you been inside a prison? |
B |
Do you feel sorry for the Greeks? |
C |
Do you think it is time to move to Germany? |
A |
Are you really from here? |
B |
Are you jealous of someone? |
C |
Aren’t you forgetting something? |
A |
What is your real age? |
B |
What is your real home? |
A |
Is this what we asked for? |
B |
Are we asking for it now? |
C |
Are we asking for it? |
A |
What are you reading? |
B |
What are you eating to stop you feeling tired? |
C |
Where has your laughter gone? |
A |
Are you more light or dark side of the force? |
B |
Which marijuana strain should you smoke based on your zodiac sign? |
A |
Do you know where you’re going? |
B |
Who is paying for your funeral? |
C |
Would you die for your beliefs? |
A |
How long would you last in a Pixar Movie? |
B |
Would you die for your best friend? |
C |
Would you die happy? |
A |
Would it help if I wasn’t here? |
B |
Is there something I can help you with? |
C |
Do you clear your browsing history? |
A |
Is this what we asked for? |
B |
Are we asking for it now? |
C |
Are we asking for it? |
A |
How Many Late ’90s Premier League Stars Can You Name? |
B |
Is this an ambition of yours? |
C |
Who are the ten most disappointed cats on the internet? |
A |
Who said it: Donald Trump or Lucille Bluth? |
B |
Who is better looking, you or the cast of the original Big Brother? |
C |
Who are the ten most dangerous people to look up on Google? |
B |
Which female prison drama are you? |
C |
What job would you have in a Disney movie? |
A |
Is this acceptable? |
B |
Which “Sherlock” character is your soulmate based on your taste in food? |
C |
Would you prefer to be poor or elderly? |
A |
Do you like to dance? |
B |
Do you believe that children are the future? |
C |
Would you prefer to be here, there or everywhere? |
A |
Do you feel close to me? |
A |
Are you worth it? |
B |
How many people do you know, who are one of us? |
A |
Is this what you wanted? |
B |
Is this really what you wanted? |
C |
Is this everything that you wanted? |
A |
What is dignified about silence? |
B |
Do you have a nectar card? |
C |
Is this inevitable? |
A |
How often do you feel lonely? |
B |
Have you tasted discomfort? |
C |
Have you tasted rage? |
A |
Have you discovered this one crazy secret for a flat stomach? |
B |
Have you switched your energy supplier in the last twelve months? |
A |
Is this everything that we wanted? |
B |
Is this everything that we asked for? |
C |
Are we asking for it all, right now? |
A |
Have you been hoarding canned food? |
B |
Do you plan to have any more children? |
C |
Are you proud of your heritage? |
A |
Do you ignore bleeding gums? |
B |
Do you feel embarrassed by your skincare routine? |
A |
Which Harry Potter character are you based on your birth month? |
B |
What are you making up for? |
C |
What is keeping you here? |
A |
Do you have an idea? |
B |
Do you have any idea? |
A |
Which carb is your soulmate? |
B |
What small life changes should you make? |
C |
Are you Netflix or are you chill? |
A |
Is it my idea? |
B |
Is this my idea? |
C |
Is this public enough for you? |
A |
Do you think I am listening? |
B |
Have you lost something recently? |
C |
Are you more Justin Beiber or One Direction? |
A |
Do you remember the first time? |
B |
Do you remember the difference? |
C |
Do you feel any better? |
A |
Do you have something to say? |