Getting to Know You

   Hannah Nicklin, Johanna Linsley and Greg McLaren reading

Mary Paterson

Read by Hannah Nicklin, Johanna Linsley, Greg McLaren

Instructions

  • A, B and C are separate speakers.
  • Stand in a row, facing the audience.
  • Shout each question like a rallying cry.
  • Pause at the empty lines.
  • Start at a comfortable pace, then speed up to make sure you fit it all in within three minutes.


A

Are you here?

B

Are you recording?

C

Are you ready?

A

Are you asking for it?

A

Which Friends character are you, based on your birth month?

B

Can we guess if you had sex this morning?

C

What does your most used emoji say about you?

A

Do you know what’s happening in the news?

B

Which United Nations security council member are you?

C

Which Disney sidekick are you based on your zodiac sign?

A

Do you believe in James Bond?

B

Can you match the iconic phone to the movie?

C

What does a billionnaire put on her skin?

A

Who is looking after your most elderly relative?

B

Are you being followed?

C

Are you in the public interest?

A

Would you press the button?

C

Are you hungry?

A

Are you ready?

B

Is this how you keep up with things?

A

Is this what you wanted?

B

Is this what you asked for?

C

Are you asking for it now?

A

Have you forgotten something recently?

B

How well do you know sandwiches?

A

Which famous blond will you marry?

B

Do you like to wear other people’s clothes?

A

Can you bear the sound of other people breathing?

B

Are you a seedy bitch, a needy bitch or a greedy bitch?

C

Would you like to share?

B

What is keeping you?

C

What is keeping you here?

B

Are you asking for it?

C

Are you asking for it now?

B

Are you recording me?

C

Are you legal?

A

What are the ten best paperbacks ever?

B

What is the last thing you should do before you die?

C

Have you travelled further than your parents in their lifetime?

A

Have you considered a cruise?

B

Have you ever seen a feminist movie?

C

Can you guess what these world famous DJs eat for breakfast?

A

Do you have tough, scaly skin?

B

Do you have a problem belly?

C

Do you announce things to strangers?

A

Do you want to keep moving?

B

Would you share your bedroom?

C

Do you steal food?

A

Have you been inside a prison?

B

Do you feel sorry for the Greeks?

C

Do you think it is time to move to Germany?

A

Are you really from here?

B

Are you jealous of someone?

C

Aren’t you forgetting something?

A

What is your real age?

B

What is your real home?

A

Is this what we asked for?

B

Are we asking for it now?

C

Are we asking for it?

A

What are you reading?

B

What are you eating to stop you feeling tired?

C

Where has your laughter gone?

A

Are you more light or dark side of the force?

B

Which marijuana strain should you smoke based on your zodiac sign?

A

Do you know where you’re going?

B

Who is paying for your funeral?

C

Would you die for your beliefs?

A

How long would you last in a Pixar Movie?

B

Would you die for your best friend?

C

Would you die happy?

A

Would it help if I wasn’t here?

B

Is there something I can help you with?

C

Do you clear your browsing history?

A

Is this what we asked for?

B

Are we asking for it now?

C

Are we asking for it?

A

How Many Late ’90s Premier League Stars Can You Name?

B

Is this an ambition of yours?

C

Who are the ten most disappointed cats on the internet?

A

Who said it: Donald Trump or Lucille Bluth?

B

Who is better looking, you or the cast of the original Big Brother?

C

Who are the ten most dangerous people to look up on Google?

B

Which female prison drama are you?

C

What job would you have in a Disney movie?

A

Is this acceptable?

B

Which “Sherlock” character is your soulmate based on your taste in food?

C

Would you prefer to be poor or elderly?

A

Do you like to dance?

B

Do you believe that children are the future?

C

Would you prefer to be here, there or everywhere?

A

Do you feel close to me?

A

Are you worth it?

B

How many people do you know, who are one of us?

A

Is this what you wanted?

B

Is this really what you wanted?

C

Is this everything that you wanted?

A

What is dignified about silence?

B

Do you have a nectar card?

C

Is this inevitable?

A

How often do you feel lonely?

B

Have you tasted discomfort?

C

Have you tasted rage?

A

Have you discovered this one crazy secret for a flat stomach?

B

Have you switched your energy supplier in the last twelve months?

A

Is this everything that we wanted?

B

Is this everything that we asked for?

C

Are we asking for it all, right now?

A

Have you been hoarding canned food?

B

Do you plan to have any more children?

C

Are you proud of your heritage?

A

Do you ignore bleeding gums?

B

Do you feel embarrassed by your skincare routine?

A

Which Harry Potter character are you based on your birth month?

B

What are you making up for?

C

What is keeping you here?

A

Do you have an idea?

B

Do you have any idea?

A

Which carb is your soulmate?

B

What small life changes should you make?

C

Are you Netflix or are you chill?

A

Is it my idea?

B

Is this my idea?

C

Is this public enough for you?

A

Do you think I am listening?

B

Have you lost something recently?

C

Are you more Justin Beiber or One Direction?

A

Do you remember the first time?

B

Do you remember the difference?

C

Do you feel any better?

A

Do you have something to say?

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