HTTP Error Codes (v. Motherhood)

Mary Paterson

Error 403 Forbidden / The information you requested is forbidden

404 Not Found / The information you requested could not be found

406 Not acceptable / The information you requested is not acceptable

417 Expectation Failed /

because it	was fed	a stranger	and now	it is not able to form relationships
because it	was fed	a television	and now	it is not neurotypical
because it	was fed	exclusively breast milk	and now	it is not advantaged
because it	was fed	a fork	and now	it is entirely your fault
because it	was fed	non-organic pureed brocoli	and now	it is afraid
because it	was fed	A computer	and now	it is all over
because it	was fed	too early	and now	it is going to be commented on by strangers

422 Unprocessable Entity /

because it	was held	too late	and now	it is never going to speak more than one language
because its mother	was held	too regularly	and now	it is laughing
because it	was treated	By a computer	and now	it is too late
because its mother	was treated	With unclean hands	and now	it is going to be sick
because it	was treated	To ice cream	and now	it is unusually warm
because its mother	went to bed	With a childminder	and now	it is crying
because its mother	went to bed	With its father	and now	it is a funny colour

424 Failed Dependency / Your request is a failed dependency

because it	was treated	next to a radiator	and now	it is all over
because its mother	went to bed with	a mirror	and now	it is disadvantaged
because its mother	Was seen	too regularly	and now	it is entirely your fault
because it	was treated	too sternly	and now	it is filled with existential rage
because it	was fed	unclean hands	and now	it is going to be commented on by strangers
because it	Went to bed with	ice cream	and now	it is going to be obscene
because its mother	was shown	a mirror	and now	it is going to be sick

429 Too Many Requests / This computer has made too many requests

because its mother	was shown	non-organic pureed brocoli	and now	it is going to make too much noise
because it	was seen	too early	and now	it is missing something
because it	was held by	a fork	and now	it is never going to speak more than one language
because it	was held	next to a radiator	and now	it is not able to communicate properly
because its mother	Went to bed with	a childminder	and now	it is not able to form relationships
because it	went to bed with	a computer screen	and now	it is too late
because it	was treated with	a mirror	and now	it is unusually warm
because its mother	was fed	non-organic pureed brocoli	and now	it is not able to form relationships
because it	was fed	A stranger	and now	it is not neurotypical
because it	was seen	too kindly	and now	it is entirely your fault
because it	was seen	too late	and now	it is afraid
because it	went to bed	exclusively breast milk	and now	it is never going to speak more than one language

444 No Response / The information you requested is not responding

because its mother	was treated with	exclusively formula	and now	it is filled with existential rage
because it	was fed	exclusively breast milk	and now	it is not able to communicate properly
because its mother	was fed	exclusively formula	and now	it is going to be obscene
because it	was shown	exclusively breast milk	and now	it is never going to speak more than one language
because its mother	was shown	exclusively formula	and now	it is laughing
because it	was seen with	Exclusively breastmilk	and now	it is too late
because its mother	was seen with	exclusively formula	and now	it is going to be sick
because it	was held by	exclusively breast milk	and now	it is unusually warm
because its mother	was held by	exclusively formula	and now	it is crying
because it	was treated with	exclusively breast milk	and now	it is a funny colour

Error message: can't